Song Sun

Last night (Monday) our friend, Song, died. He had lived 44 years and committed his life to Christ since 1996. When his daughter, Stacy, came home from school yesterday she saw him through the bedroom window. She broke a window to get in, called 911, and attempted CPR. Stacy's 6th grade brother, Jeffrey, and their mother, Tonya came home when they heard the news.

Stacy had called Honey Rogers who then left a message on our answering machine. Honey was sobbing. Later, when Nicole and I got there we were greeted by about 20 people. Tonya came out the door and hugged Nicole and was crying. We went in and Stacy and Jeffrey came and hugged us and Stacy was sobbing. I think we were there for a couple of hours. We were struck by how articulate Stacy and Jeffrey were about their grief. Jeffrey said he had been crying a lot and he cried several times while we were there. He said, "I usually spend Christmas with Ms. Anita . . . It's going to be a sad Christmas." Stacy showed us a picture and we asked if we could try to enlarge it and frame it for her. She said she would appreciate that. She cried on Nicole's shoulder and said, "I didn't get to say goodbye."

Eventually, the patriarch of the family (on Tonya's side) and his wife came (and their other children, Sokha, Sokhom, and Sop'ol). He is 97 years old! I had been looking forward to meeting him for a long time because I had heard his daughter, Sokha, and also Song talk about him. Song periodically sought wisdom from this man (I still don't know his name). He and his wife embraced Nicole and I as well as most everyone else in the house, especially Stacy and Jeffrey.

Mostly Nicole and I sat on the floor with the children. (Kun and her six-year-old, Jonathan, were there, too.) We cried. We laughed some. We talked about what they would do this week. Stacy has final exams this week. (She's 15.) Her three best friends since diapers were with her for most of the time while we were there. Jeffrey helped Jonathon with his homework.

I know that my own grief is very little compared with Stacy and Jeffrey. Still, I loved Song. Nicole did, too. He was my friend, especially for the past year and a half. Last year I often went to Song's house and we would talk for over an hour. He came to Bible class and church services every week. Miss Honey picked him up because he was legally blind due to diabetes. Still, he would bring his large print Bible and magnifying glass. I have so many good memories of talking with Song. He loved hearing Jesus' parables and I think he understood them better than I did. He had already heard many of them before, but sometimes there would be a new one. One time we were reading Luke 6:17-49 in Bible class. This was before he got a big print Bible so he took the paper home that had the verses on it and later that week asked Stacy to read those verses again. Song always rejoiced when he heard Jesus' teachings, even the hard ones like this one:

"Why do you notice the small piece of dust that is in your friend's eye, but you don't see the big piece of wood that is in your own eye? You say to your friend, 'Let me get that little piece of dust out of your eye.' Why do you say this? Can't you see that big piece of wood in your own eye? You are a hypocrite. First, take the wood out of your own eye. Then you will see clearly to get the dust out of your friend's eye."

There were people in Song's life who made it difficult to forgive. I asked Song, "How can you forgive them?" He said, "I had a lot of sins in my life. God forgave me. So I have to forgive others." He took Jesus' teaching about "the plank in your own eye" seriously and knew that it didn't come naturally for him to obey God.

I have another memory I want to share. Last year just before Thanksgiving I took Song to the emergency room. He had severe pain and his blood sugar level was super high. I sat in his room while they waited (I guess for his bsl to decrease). I mostly just listened to him talk. He had so much to say even though every once in a while he would wince from the pain. Eventually they took him to a room in ICU. That was more comfortable, but we couldn't spend as much time with him. He had quite a few visitors, though. At the time, one family member was worried about money, if Song would die. Song told her, "Why do you worry about those things? Money can't make you happy." When we were alone I asked Song, "Are you happy?" I don't know why I asked it. I've never really known what to do to comfort people. But Song said, "Yes, I am happy." Before I said anything else Song told me at least five things he was thankful for. He said he was thankful for me. I can't remember the rest, but I'm sure his children were on that list. I can't tell you how much encouragement Song gave me.

Last night (Monday), Sokha wanted us to pray before we left. She is the only Christian left in the family now that Song is gone. There were about ten of us in a circle. I know some people couldn't understand what I was saying, but we all held hands. I don't remember all of the prayer, but one part I felt compelled to say was something I had been thinking about since as soon as I heard the news of his death:

"I know that Song is right with you, God. And I believe that you will send your Son on the last day and that Song and all the dead will be raised. Then, Song will live forever because he believed in you and followed your Son." My hope for Song isn't based on wishful thinking. It's based on Truth. I have read Scripture all my life. I know what a disciple of Christ is and what obedience from a pure heart looks like. I also knew Song well. So I have confidence in God's will to raise Song to eternal life on the last day.